I did not get around to posting last week. After spending a week or two or three writing suicide notes in my head, the last week and a half were good. It hasn’t been pain-free, but it’s been manageable so it’s a good day. When the pain is bad, it is almost easier to sit and write because the need to purge is so great. And, I appreciate it when you take the time to listen. Trigeminal Neuralgia is a rare disease and I am hoping to educate people. It is one of those “hidden” diseases in that you can’t see it.

There are times I have been stopped by people and asked how am I doing. I can be in excruciating pain and they just say, “well, it will get better” or something else just as cavalier. It used to bother me but I realized that the normal person who is feeling good just cannot comprehend the depth of the pain I experience, and that’s okay. It is my cross to carry, not theirs.

It also makes me wonder why people ask how someone is feeling if they really are not interested. I’ve had people ask me and then almost doze off no matter how short an answer I give. I think it is because I am a highly sensitive person (HSP) that I notice the behavior of others that most would miss. The insight has made me more aware of my own behavior and one I do not do is ask questions that I am not willing to stand there and pay attention to the answer. When I have a conversation, I make sure that the person knows I am listening and then I ask questions. People need to be validated and not brushed off. If you ask someone a question, please take the time to listen to them. They notice when you don’t.

I also had an appointment with my oncologist, whom I had not seen since before the virus disrupted our lives. I am happy to report that my platelet count is still good. It is steadily climbing, and hopefully, it will level off soon so we can stop adjusting my meds. I also spoke with her about having brain surgery. Surgery is something I may consider if I continue to have pain. It is not something I want to do, but it is an option. I was quite impressed with her knowledge of neurosurgery and she approved me for surgery should I decide to go that route.

I hope you all have a good week and the weather will cooperate and give us all a little sunshine. Thanks for stopping by.