All of my life ,I have never been a person to take medicine freely. The doctor would truly have to plead his case on why I needed an antibiotic; and even more so if he deemed a shot necessary. Well, since I’ve gotten to the ripe “old” age of 52, it seems that the roles are now reversed and I am the one doing the justifying and pleading. “I’ll do better. I promise.”
     I just finished laying out my daily “meal” of vitamins and drugs – from the lost battle with the doctor – out on the counter. I refer to it as a meal because it takes up as much space on a plate as an actual meal. There’s Vitamin B, Vitamin C, Vitamin D and E (kind of has a sing/song effect if you do it just right), Glucosamine-Chondroitin (you know you’ve reached a certain age when you can actually spell that off the top of your head) and fish oil. Then, there are the big boys – Hydrochlorothiazide and Hydroxychlor. Doesn’t that sound appetizing?! I have a huge glass of ice cold milk and I’m ready for breakfast!
     As I survey all the various capsules and pills that lay before me, a single thought comes to mind – well, actually more than that, but they aren’t very nice ones – and that is, do they think we’re horses? I truly do think that’s why they are referred to as “horse pills.” They are sooooo colossally huge! Come on now. Are we really supposed to swallow these mammoth sized capsules? I can also assure you that this size is the ONLY size they come in. I stood in front of the vitamin section in the store yesterday, peered at, and shook every bottle I saw just to check. I was determined to prove this theory. I even had to hold some of the bottles up to the light to see within! At that point, I noticed that the clerks were beginning to look as though they might be considering a mutiny and me being tossed out of the store seemed to be the next step.
     Being convinced, finally, that I wasn’t going to find any chewable vitamins for my age group – the over 5 years old group – I tossed an assortment of vitamins into my buggy and proceeded to the checkout counter where I was promptly greeted with, “Gee, you must be falling apart. This is the second prescription you’ve had filled in two weeks.” (Yep! Those were my thoughts too – yours, not hers.) Now, don’t get the wrong idea, this is a very nice person and she meant no harm; but, my ego still took a horrible beating! Afterall, I am only on the other side of young.

 

First posted June 25, 2010