We experienced weather changes yesterday. We had a front blow through and the rain brought in a cool front along with drier weather. Humidity in the South can be cruel. My sinuses calmed down with the drier weather, and I experienced the best evening I have had in a long, long time. Normally, with every step I take, pain resonates through my face and yesterday it was nice to walk without pain.

I had a peaceful night. A while back on my doctor’s advice, I upped my dosage of Zyrtec to 1.5 tablets. I’m not sure it’s helping with the sinus condition, but I sleep like the dead so most mornings I awake rested. Today was one of those mornings.

I have a morning routine and it includes my cup of hot cocoa (not a coffee drinker). This usually sets the tone for the day. If it’s painful to drink my cocoa, I pretty much know how the day will play out. Last night I was able to eat with no problem. That was a meal I really enjoyed. It didn’t matter what it was, it mattered that I could eat without pain. It was the same this morning. I didn’t have any problems drinking my cocoa, however, when it came to lunch, I sat down with a little too much hope. Although I had no problems at breakfast, the pain was again evident at lunch.

It’s odd, or maybe not, as I no longer look at things the same, but when I tell someone I am having problems eating, one of the most frequent suggestions (and my doctor said this one) is why don’t you blend your food. That may sound plausible to most people, but I find it entertaining. They have no clue. I’m telling this story because you may have no doubt said the same thing to someone. My pain is caused by nerves firing down my face. It makes contact with the nerves in my pallet and my lips. This is why it is painful for me to eat. It’s not because I can’t chew, well, technically I can’t, but that’s not the issue. When you drink or eat, you use every part of your mouth. This isn’t something you normally think of so you don’t understand the process of trying to eat with pain firing off nerves. It’s no one’s fault. I never gave it a second thought before I developed this disease.

For me, the very motion of putting food in my mouth can be painful. An example is when you use a spoon to eat something, your natural inclination is to close your lips and wipe it off the spoon. When my lips make contact with a spoon, fork, or cup, the nerves in my lips spark pain. It would be the same if I tried to sip from a straw (that’s been suggested too.) This means any liquids or foods that would require this motion are off-limits as I try to cause myself as little pain as possible.

Step one eliminates a lot of foods. While it may defy logic, food I can cut up into small bites and put in the left side of my mouth skips this step and I can chew enough to be able to move it around to the back of my mouth and swallow. It is in-between these two steps where the pain comes in. I have to concentrate so I do not engage my pallet. I believe I spoke about this in my last post. Before I sat down to write this, I was putting leftovers into containers. I decided to eat a bite. I will explain exactly what happened.

I put a couple of macaroni in my mouth and forgot to put it to the left. The minute I did this the pain reminded me because instinct is to move the tongue to the pallet. Pallet = pain. When I do this, the phrase between a rock and a hard place comes to mind. At this point when the pain is firing and from my pallet to my forehead feels like acid is flowing through the nerve, it would cause me the same excruciating pain whether I attempt to spit the food out or try to move it to the side of my mouth where I can wait motionless until the burning subsides. Meanwhile, my face is burning and my eyes are crying from the pain. It is literally paralyzing. As I have written about before, the crying just comes. At all costs, I try not to cry because the pain worsens, but the body takes over and it cries. I’m not crying but my face is.

This is the best that I can describe what happens. I can sit here and laugh at the moment but I have learned there are some foods that I really need to assess how the day is going before I put them in my mouth. Rice. Rice is a killer. When you eat rice, do you realize how it travels about your mouth? For me, one little piece of rice in the wrong place can cause pain like you cannot imagine. Oatmeal. Not many people like oatmeal, but I do. That stuff isn’t coming anywhere near me at certain times. Stew or gumbo. No liquids so I can’t eat either of those. M&Ms. I can put M&Ms in the side of my mouth and let them melt carefully. When you love chocolate you find a way!

This has been my day. No more eating. I may try to drink another cup of hot cocoa or maybe a cup of tea for dinner. I was surprised that I was able to go out and walk around the yard a little bit and play with my dog. The wind has been bad as of late and if I’m outside, it will hurt my face. There was a slight breeze today but it didn’t bother me. It felt great to have the sun on my face. I miss that. I miss the sun.

Thank you for following along with me this week. If you have any questions, please leave them in the comments and I will answer them tomorrow. God bless and good night.

 

https://mylifeonestoryatatime.com/2019/07/18/living-with-a-trigeminal-neuralgia-flare-up/